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Introduction

Dear Jalen,

It’s 2am on a Monday morning. I’m lying in bed awake next to my soundly sleeping husband, a dog at my side and two more at my feet. The weight of each pressed on different parts of my body accompanied by the weight of the world on my shoulders. I can’t exactly move so I lay. I lay looking up at the ceiling, the still of the night interrupted only by the sounds of a Vizsla snoring when I begin my ritual basic math calculations. If I fall asleep in the next ten minutes, that gives me roughly 3 1/2 hours of sleep before I have to wake up to get ready to start this day all over again. I can make it through the day on 3 1/2 hours of sleep, right? Of course! Besides, I took a shower before I went to sleep so really, if I needed to, I could skip showering in the morning and sleep in an extra 20 minutes if I really needed it and still make it to work on time.

photo(8)
The ceiling.

And so it goes, only I never fall asleep in the next 10 minutes and the calculations start all over again. It’s in these late hours that the most random thoughts find their way creeping through my head. It’s also in these late hours when I realize all the things I should have accomplished in the day that I will instead intend to complete the next, but then push-off until the next, and ultimately re-schedule for the next and so on. One of those things I should have accomplished? Your baby book. It’s dawned on me that I have been meaning to make note of all the milestones you’ve accomplished, the lessons I’ve learned becoming a mother for the first time and oh how much you’ve grown over this past year. Only, you’re already three. I have a lot of catching up to do.

“If all goes according to plan, we’ll be spending several years of our lives together…” – Robin L. Reynolds

So I’ll start at the beginning. My name is Robin but you like to call me Mama. Meeting you was both a joyous and terrifying moment that I will cherish for the rest of my life. I’m thirty-something. I’m sometimes overwhelmed, I’m easily discouraged, I find humor in the smallest and sometimes strangest of places and this…well, this is your baby book. Every Monday I’ll post a new “chapter” of your life, I’ll explain how we all came together and I’ll share with you life lessons that I believe will serve you well as you begin to find your way through this thing called life. I’ll get started on it tomorrow. Really, I will. It’s just that if I can fall asleep in the next ten minutes that will leave me with 2 1/2 hours of sleep before I need to get up to get ready for work…..

xoxo

Mama

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4 thoughts on “Introduction”

  1. I do that too, working out how much sleep I will get if I fall asleep now. Then worrying that’s not enough, which then stops me getting to sleep. I love your idea of writing blog posts as letters to your daughter.

    Liked by 1 person

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